What else could go wrong?

Last Wednesday Babycake got sick. We put her to bed and an hour later rushed up to her screaming cry. Poor little girl was up every hour for the remainder of the night puking until she had nothing left in her. It was a rough night for all. In the morning at 7 am however, she was chipper and raring to go as if she had gotten a full night's sleep with no sickness. It amazes me how kids can bounce back from things.

Two night's later my husband, who averages getting sick to once every two years, went to bed early complaining of an upset stomach. I stayed up watching the Olympics. Once I was done watching I made rounds of locking up the house. To my surprise, I found our garage and basement flooded. We had had a really nasty one hour storm pass through that night, but with it being so short I though nothing of the possibility of flooding. (due to the layout of our house we flood easily). Since hubby was up sleeping off his stomach ache I got to set up our portable sump pump and mop up.

Needless to say, I was exhausted by the time I tumbled into bed. About a half hour after I got in bed, hubby jumps out of bed and pukes on his way to the bathroom. I believe I failed to mention in the beginning of this post how I do not do puke. Dirty diapers, sure, baby spit up, ok, gushing blood, gross but fixable. Puke.... gag.

Anyway, we have hardwood or tile everywhere in our home... except the hallway/stairway... where hubby let it rip. I walked to the bathroom once I no longer heard heaving, and asked if he was ok. He said he felt much better, and that he would clean up the hallway. So I grabbed my pillow and headed downstairs to sleep on the couch where the smell of sick would not reach my nostrils.

The next morning I went upstairs to tend to our alarm clock, aka our daughter. In order to get to her room I had to walk past the disaster zone. Well, there wasn't anything chunky left, but it was far from cleaned up. Hubby was not better. He stayed in bed with exceptions of trips to the loo the following day. Of course this would happen on a day I volunteered to watch my friend's three kids.

So the job of cleaning vomit, and continuing to tend to the flooding lay on my shoulders. My nightmare clean up job come true. I don't know how many times I sprayed and scrubbed that hallway carpet, or squeegeed the basement floor. All that cleaning while making sure the four children under my roof were fed, clothed, relatively happy/entertained and overall surviving. On days such as that one I strive to follow my grandmother's example and honestly wonder how she and her 12 children survived.

In any case, while working on the carpet I used up the remainder of our carpet cleaner and so turned to Pinterest for homemade carpet cleaner recipes. I'm attempting to go green in our house, plus I really didn't feel like hauling the kids to the store. This homemade recipe by TJ is the one I liked the best because it seemed to do as well as the store bought:

http://www.measuringflower.com/2013/06/naturally-clean-vomit-carpet-allpurpose-carpet-cleaner-recipe/

Sad note, this didn't totally clean up the carpet. I think that by the time I got to working on the carpet, it was beyond repair, stained and disgustingly smelly. Most likely if I would have started the cleaning process immediately than it could have been saved.

Yep, I said "could have been saved." We had to rip out the carpet. Now, for most people this would probably be a stressful decision. Me? No way. I have hated that old disgusting carpet since the day we moved in and have just been waiting for an excuse to get rid of it. This was it! I totally didn't plan on this, I tried to clean it. I had my face mask, gloves, and scrub brush. I honestly didn't try to pull one over my husband while he was sick. I just got lucky :-)

Our house was built in the mid 1950s. So in almost every room of the house there is really nice hardwood! For some reason the previous owners thought that it was better to have carpet in every room and covered it up. Um.... No. Not having carpet in the house when there are children is the best thing ever. When they spill you just wipe it up, when they, or your husband, is sick, you wipe it up. There is no scrubbing and deep cleaning involved. Simply, wipe, disinfect, and dry!

I could not be happier with the outcome of hubby's illness. He is fully recovered and currently taking his turn to do the dishes. Our basement is dry, I still have to work more on the garage as it's got dirt everywhere now. Oh, did I mention our basement toilet clogged, and couldn't be easily unclogged that same day and added to the basement flooding? Well, hubby is also working on that tonight since we simply turned off it's water supply to make a quick fix of that problem. It's apparently going to take the stuff he got a couple days to fully unclog the toilet.

I don't think I've ever been happier to have a weekend over and see a Monday.

Being a Stay At Home Parent in Today's USA

How do I even begin this post? I have so many thoughts...

I am a Stay-At-Home-Mom. My mom was a SAHM. My grandmother and her's before her were SAHMs.

Everyone knows how much our world has changed since the time our grandparents were our age. We know it is different now from when our parents were raising us. Schools are different, music is different, TV, computers, internet, socializing. Almost every aspect of our lives have been affected and tweaked in some way with the change in time. Change is a part of life. The little changes come without us even noticing, we switch brands of bread, take a different route to school/work. Big changes however, can rock our world; moving, a job promotion, job loss, graduating school.

I did not want to be a SAHM. I wasn't even sure if I wanted kids. I love kids, I worked with kids. I enjoyed being able to teach them, play with them, help them, love them, and at the end of the day leave them with their parents. I enjoyed having the freedom to be myself and live my life as I wanted at the end of the day and on the weekend. I knew from witnessing the parents in my life that being a mother is a full time job. Not a 40hr/week full time. No.  It's a 24/7, 365 days a year job... for 18+ years. You don't get 4 weeks vacation or weekends, there will be long hours, and you'll have night shifts after a full day's work. Appealing right?

I am a SAHM for two reasons. First, I truly believe that for the first three years of a child's life his/her parents need to be there- full time. I think it is crucial for the parent/child relationship that a parent raise the child instead of a day care. (I understand there can be exceptions such as single parents who need to work to support the family) The child needs to know the parent is always there for them, "Mom and Dad are my number one support." Children go to school for 7-8 hrs starting at the age of five. Parents get their breaks then. We should give all we can to our children in their first years. The first years set the building blocks for the rest of their lives. The second reason I'm a SAHM is that even if I were to work, my pay, and part of my husbands, would go straight to child care- it's expensive!

(Let me add here that I absolutely adore my daughter who was the biggest surprise/accident of my life)

The hardships of parenthood listed above were the ones I knew about before becoming a parent. No one had ever mentioned how isolating it can be to be a stay at home parent. When I was still pregnant and had decided that I would be staying home once Babycake was born, people would always say how nice that is, or how lucky I was, or that it was the right thing to do. Despite my fear of parenting, these kind words encouraged me.

Once I had Babycake though, my life no longer existed. Days and nights were ruled by her schedule. I no longer saw my friends. None of them had kids, they all had jobs, they could hang out at 7 pm (or even later!). My family all lives out of town. My  husband works long hours. I was alone with my infant. Days turned to weeks, weeks to months, and I was regularly left alone with my child.


I remember when I was a child, listening to my mom swapping stories with her six sisters about growing up in a neighborhood where all the moms were home and the streets were covered with kids playing. If I was going to be home all day, I wanted that scene to be my reality. I wanted to be able to walk over to my neighbor's house in the middle of the morning and talk; about anything. I missed adult interaction. Isolation- the perfect place for depression to fester.

How was this staying home thing "so nice" as those women exclaimed when I was pregnant? Before having my daughter I was "a social butterfly." I am an extrovert- I get energy from being with people. I love people. I hate constantly being by myself. I enjoy breaks by myself but not being home, all day every day.

How was I to meet other moms? I couldn't just walk out my front door like the old days. I searched for groups to join, or places to hang out. Almost everything cost money. Even the mom groups I found had a membership fee. The only free place I found that was age appropriate for Babycake and social for me was the library where it had a baby reading time. I liked it, Babycake liked it, but in the first year, her nap schedule changed enough times that we weren't able to go for six months due to time conflict.

Finally I decided to cough up the dough and budget so Babycake and I could become members of the YMCA. Thank goodness they base membership fees on family income! We're also very lucky that Indy has multiple locations. I tried a couple places and picked our future home away from home. I first fell in love with the Y because it's child care is free, and good (of course different locations may have better or worse child care). I also LOVE the exercise classes. They have a lot and a great variety.

Because my life still revolves around Babycake's schedule, we go to the Y at the same time every day. You know what? That's the same reason all the other moms in the classes I go to are there too! We're all dependent on our kid's schedules. We're also there to get a break from our kids and to take care of ourselves. Many of us were home alone with our kids before joining the Y.

I've made great friends since becoming a member of the Y. We're all in the same boat. We can talk for hours about diapering experiences, potty training, bedtime routines, etc and no one gets bored. We understand each other because we're all going through it. We ask each other for tips and tricks in parenting. "She won't eat x anymore, did your kids do that?" "Did she change her bedtime this early?" "How was it potty training him?"

Babycake and I now go on play dates. Babycake has many friends (all children of my new friends). We get to go to birthday parties. The other moms/dads and I swap babysitting date nights. Because we see our friends often Babycake has learned how to share and how to be aware of those around her. She will also be old enough to do gymnastics and soccer at the Y this year. I could not be more excited for her.

I do envy my friends who don't have kids. I wish I could stay up past 10 on any given night and not be exhausted the next morning. What would my house look like without toys everywhere, in every room? What would it be like to have a spur of the moment date night with my husband? It would be so fun to be able to call up a friend to get together that afternoon without having to find a babysitter or plan a dinner for the family while I'll be gone.

But that's not my life. Mine is the early mornings and early nights. Mine is the toddler temper tantrums, the smudged windows, and the finger print covered walls. It may be drastically different from my dreams, it isn't even the children filled neighborhood, but it is no longer a lonely life.

Babycake's Baby Blankets

As I stated in my last post about my love for crochet, I'm relatively new at it. I only learned after having my daughter just under two years ago. The first crochet project I attempted and completed, was a baby hat with a little brim. Too cute! Soon after I finished that venture I decided to take on a very personal project. Babycake's great grandma had a tradition of crocheting blankets for every baby in the family. Grandma had the pattern picked and the yarn ready for the blanket, she even started the blanket. However, by the time Babycake was born Grandma had been battling Parkinson's disease for 20 years and was unable to crochet.

"Made Especially For You" tag
and picture on blanket.

Because Grandma could not crochet, she made Babycake a fleece tie blanket. It is beautiful, soft, and warm. The blanket is perfect, it is large and will be able to transfer to a "big kid" bed, but has Pooh Bear and friends on it so is still young. This blanket was by far my favorite baby shower gift.

 After sharing my new found love of crochet, I was given the baby blanket pattern and yarn. The yarn was girly, but it wasn't really what I considered "baby blanket" material. So I went and got new babyish yarn and began. 

Even though the concept of making a blanket seems easier than a hat, the baby blanket was much more difficult. This would be because the pattern in the hat was simply double crochet stitches. For the blanket I had to learn how to do a shell stitch and figure out how to make the blanket's edges straight while doing that stitch. I think it took me a month and a half to finish the blanket. Like the baby hat, I did a lot of starting, undoing, and starting over. Here is the finished product:

This pattern is called Innocence. It is in Baby Wraps: 8 Crochet Blankets. The design was created by Ginger Thomas.

A little closer view of the pattern.

Babycake loves both her blankets. She sleeps with them every night (unless they are in the wash). It warms my heart when she notices one is missing (due to needing a cleaning) and searches for it. I'm sure once summer rolls around we'll have to put the fleece blanket in the closet, but it'll come right back out in the fall!

I would love to share this pattern with you, however, I don't want to break any copy right laws. This is why I shared the title of the book in which it can be found, and the designer of the pattern. 

My Relatively Newfound Love of Crochet

I learned to knit in college when some of my girlfriends were doing it and I realized the cost of making a scarf for a Christmas present was MUCH cheaper than buying one. I made lots of scarves for lots of people over the course of several years. I had heard of crocheting, I knew a good number of people who could do it, but the thought of learning to crochet was daunting to me. How could it be easier, or faster, using one crochet hook instead of two knitting needles?

It wasn't until after Babycake was born that I decided to learn to crochet. I became a Stay-At-Home-Momma when I had her. So for the first few months we were at home- a lot. I got bored and wanted do something. My cousin had made an adorable sweater for Babycake and I wanted to be able to do that too. However, she had crocheted the sweater... I couldn't do that. Actually, what I really wanted to make was a hat for Babycake. She had out grown the hospital caps and other newborn size hats, but didn't fit the other hats we had waiting for her.

So I googled patterns for knitting hats. Did you know how much more work there is to knit a hat than to crochet one?! Well, I'm not really sure if it's a lot more work, but when you don't know how to knit or crochet in a circle, the step by step picture instructions for crochet looked a lot easier.

My mom came up to visit a lot those first few months and she attempted to teach me to crochet. Needless to say it wasn't very successful. She hadn't crocheted in over a decade and I am a bit of a perfectionist who likes to get it right right away.

So again I turned to Google. How did we function before the search engine?! I found a ton of adorable baby crochet hat patterns. However, I still didn't know how to crochet. Now I turned to YouTube. Voila! Step by step videos! Tons of free patterns! This was the place I needed to be. YouTube became my crochet instructor. By browsing YouTube I was able to learn multiple crochet stitches and begin my hat for Babycake. Here is the picture of the hat I was going for:

The Cheri Hat. Pattern can be found on the Happy Baby Crochet blog site:
http://www.happybabycrochet.com/2010/12/baby-crochet-hats-free-patterns.html

As a newbie to crocheting, this simple hat was a bit difficult. Mainly the brim was the hard part. The pattern is honestly an easy one. The instructions are simple and clear. Since it took me long enough to make the hat, I didn't go for making the flower too. I think over all it took about 1-2 weeks to make this hat. I did a lot of starting over. This is the finished product on Babycake at about 1-2 months of age:

The brim is not as long as the original picture, but what does a one month old really need a brim for? I'd say that for choosing to learn to make a hat as the first thing in crochet instead of a straight lined scarf or blanket, I did pretty well.

Since making this hat for Babycake just under two years ago, I've gone on to make blankets, scarves, mug cozies, ear warmers, and more hats. I enjoy making things for people and as a SAHM, crocheting has become a quick and easy way for me to do that.

And We're Potty Trained!

Today we had a wonderful success! I left Babycake in her underwear (and pants) at the Y childcare for two hours while I worked out. When I picked her up she was still in her same clothes and had peed in the potty! This is really great news. For the last two weeks Babycake has been pretty good about using public toilets, as in she is not afraid of using them. However, when we go out places I'm still in charge of reminding her to go so she doesn't have an accident. If I don't, and she tells me she needs to go, we rarely make it to a nearby restroom before she wets herself.

I am so proud that I can say Babycake is potty trained. I do not have any tricks to share on how to successfully potty train in one week, let alone a single weekend. I wish I did! No, it took Babycake a solid two weeks before we went out in public and she didn't wet herself. When we are home she very rarely has an accident. She is very good at stopping what she is doing, running to the potty, pulling down her pants, going, and flushing. We're still working on continually remembering to wipe before flushing, and to wash hands. So I wouldn't say she's completely potty trained since we're still working on those, and she doesn't always stay dry during naps, and I'm not even thinking about bedtime dryness. However, I really feel that to get as far as we are is a great achievement.

It has taken three weeks to get to this lovely place in potty training. The first week was by far the worst. This would be b/c we were cooped up in the house the entire week (talk about a mom going crazy!) and I received a lot of discouraging comments about my desire to potty train (this is discussed in my original Potty Training post). The second week is when things really turned around, and the third week is when it all became more habitual- for everyone ;-)

Before I started potty training I googled and researched different ideas and all the quickest ways to do it. I thought we would be ready. Babycake has been sitting on the potty, doing nothing, every night before her bath since she turned one. She has never been afraid of the potty so that wasn't our problem. However, Babycake is not a verbal toddler. She is a physical toddler. There's no way she could string a couple words to make a sentence right now, but by 19 months she knew how to do a somersault on her own. I never figured communication would be our problem in potty training. She understands everything I say, she simply doesn't express herself verbally. How was she to let me know she needed to go?

So I started our potty adventure with high hopes. I started out bribing with candy. That only lasted a couple days. Babycake quickly learned how to get candy while sitting on the potty, then not do anything. Sneaky! So I traded the candy with sticker rewards charts. That has worked pretty well. At first she was motivated to pee to get a sticker, but at this point she'll go with or without the sticker. I'll still offer the stickers and sometimes she'll take them or sometimes she'll leave it to me to put it on the chart. She does like to go up and count all her sticker rewards.

<  Left: Upstairs potty station- used at wake up and bedtime.

Right:   >
Main floor/ all day potty station. This is the new potty with smaller, cushioned seat.


Both stations have reward sticker charts, books, and wipes.


About half way through the first week of potty training I went and got a smaller potty b/c I'd realized part of the problem was that her tush was just too small for our current potty. Then I went off to the library and got some children's potty books. I was hoping that having this subject mentioned in some fun and colorful books would make it more fun and even exciting. The books did help I think. But by the end of the week they just weren't enough. So, off to the library again. This time to get children's potty training DVDs.

Now let me just add that we do not typically let Babycake watch TV or movies unless she is having a very rough time waking from her afternoon nap- and then its no longer than 30 min (one episode of Curious George).

This potty training thing though, that's a very special circumstance. We needed all the help we could get, or maybe that was just me. Anyway, over the last two weeks she has been watching Potty Time by Two Little Hands in the morning after breakfast, and then watches Bear in the Big Blue House: When You've Got To Go (via YouTube and shared below) after her nap. Since Babycake started watching the videos, and pairing them with the potty books, she really took off with potty training- essentially on her own (while we were home). The videos are great b/c they explain the process of using the potty but they also include songs and dance. Apparently that's way more fun then Mama dancing, singing, and giving stickers when the potty is used properly. ;-)

Babycake loves both videos, but "Bear" is her favorite. I however am so thankful to have found Potty Time. This is because it includes the songs and dances I mentioned before, but also sign language. Sign Language! Perfect for the physical toddler who picked up all the baby signs I taught her with such ease and still uses most of them while saying them. I think it was only after watching this two or three times that she understood and began signing "body," "potty," "wipe," "flush," and "wash."

I am so proud of my big girl. She has learned so much. Every day seemed to take so long, each week ever lasting, but now looking back at it all, it seems to have flown by! Yet another milestone my baby has tackled. Her 2nd birthday is coming up in a couple months and I simply can't believe how fast it's all gone by.

When I started potty training I was thinking I would be giving up the diaper bag and making the move back to my purse. Ha! No, even though I no longer need to lug diapers around (we used cloth so they took up more space than disposable), I still have the extra clothes in case of an accident, a wet bag for wet clothes (if accident occurs), toys, snacks, and drink. I suppose it'll still be a year or so before I can get back to my own bag and Babycake can carry her stuff around. :-)

Our library potty books:
*Have You Seen My Potty?
*It's Potty Time
*No More Diapers For Ducky!
*Potty Time
*Big Girls Go Potty
*The Potty Train
*The Potty Book for girls

Behind the Curtain

For the last year my husband and I have noticed water leaking from our bedroom window. Like any young- broke couple, we fixed the problem by 1) laying a towel on the floor under the window to soak up the trickle of water, and 2) forget about it. Last month, I finally decided to pull back the curtain and have a looksy b/c I've felt my allergies have been worse than most winters. Upon said pulling back of curtain, I found peeling paint and splitting drywall. Ulgh. I really didn't want to think about what would be growing behind that.

So after a few reminders my husband finally got down to fixing our wall yesterday. Now, hubby has already laid tile in our bathroom, ripped up most of the old carpet in the house, and completely remodeled our lowest-level room. We figured this little piece of 2x2 wall repair should take only a couple hours at most.

What were we thinking? Home projects never go as planned. We really should have learned that lesson a while ago.

As expected mold was growing on the damp and ruined drywall. I'm sure that was helping my allergy problem. Once my husband had roughly half of the area in need of repair taken down, carpenter ants decided to join the party. Have you even seen movies where insects come swarming out of some hole? That's what I was reminded of... in our bedroom! Talk about freaked out. As hubby starts stomping and smacking, I run out to see if we have any raid. Nope. "Here! Use this disinfectant while I Google what kills ants." (FYI- disinfectant does not kill carpenter ants and just makes you cough b/c you keep spraying and inhaling it).

Needless to say, more of our wall was taken down in order to follow the leak, and find the ant nest. In the end, I slept on the couch last night, hubby didn't quit working until midnight, our wall is not finished, but most of the ants are dead- we think.

Now, I'd really like to share some of our findings on dealing with carpenter ants if you find them in your home and don't have ant killer on hand:

1) To immediately kill carpenter ants (like the ones swarming out of holes) all you need is hot water, vinegar, and peppermint oil/ tea tree oil. Mix equal parts hot water and vinegar and add some drops of peppermint/tea tree oil (i prefer peppermint oil b/c it smells better) into a spray bottle. Spray onto ants.

2) To bait the carpenter ants, mix boric acid (sold as borax in grocery stores) with either a protein food (peanut butter) or sweet food (sugar). Leave this mixture in the ant trail. They will take it back to the nest and in three days all be dead.

*remember to do this, and keep these products, out of reach of children

Lucky for us I had the ingredients for #1. However, I got rid of all the borax in the house b/c of possible health issues it may cause when used for cleaning. So hubby and I did our best to spray and kill all the ants we saw before heading out to buy some heavy duty carpenter ant bait from Lowes. (regular ant traps do not work on carpenter ants- you need to make sure you get the kind specifically made for carpenter ants)

Today, I've only seen 3 ants. It kind of freaks me out when I see one b/c I expect more to be coming right behind it, but no, I think we've taken care of the problem. I hope we can sleep in our room tonight!

Carpenter ants can be black or brown (not to be mistaken for lighter colored termites). They like moist/wet wood in dark spaces (like damp wood inside home walls). Carpenter ants don't actually eat the wood like termites but simply make their nests in it.

Impromptu Science Lesson

Today we woke to two more inches of snow outside and a warm 27 degrees. Today also happens to be super bowl Sunday, or as commercials say "The Big Game Day." So our little family doesn't have plans until this evening. I ask Babycake if she would like to play with play-dough as we've already played chase, made a blanket fort, read some books, and watched "Bear in the Big Blue House: Potty." Did I mention it was only like 10 am?

She got very excited at the idea of playing with play-dough which was surprising as she'd never before seen or played with it. My husband also got a little excited to for some reason. So there we all were squashing the dough, asking Babycake which dough was which color, and cutting shapes to see if she could identify them. Then, hubby takes all the yellow, makes a big ball, and sets it, with purpose, in the center of our table. Me, "what are you doing?" Him, "just wait, you'll see." Me, "making the solar system hu?" Him, slightly disappointed I guessed so easily, "yeah, how'd you know?" I just smiled, no need to remind him of my genius. ;-)

So as Babycake continues to squash dough and point out shapes (naming about half correctly and naming the other half the same names already mentioned) hubby and I got to work. When you have nothing to do on the day's agenda but clean, making a solar system becomes very serious work: "you're making Mars to big," "lets do Jupiter in purple," "how many moons does Venus have again?"

Babycake did not take long to realize we were no longer paying attention to her naming skills and tried to help. She really is the best-worst helper. She tries, she really does, but she just gets in the way. Like I said, this was serious work. However, b/c Babycake decided that helping was throwing pieces of play-dough at our line of planets, she helped remind us to include the asteroid belt.

Tada! Beautiful right? Pure genius.

Once we were finished my husband started to explain the solar system to Babycake. She's 21 months. She didn't have a clue what he was saying. All she got was that Daddy was pointing to the balls of play-dough and not letting her touch. Hmmmm. I got on YouTube and found a couple solar system videos for kids I had used in little lessons before with older kids I've nannied. By older I mean like 4-7 year olds.

click on image to go to video

Babycake loves this video. Honestly she still probably has no clue what it's about, but it's catchy and educational. I think we watched it about three times before hubby started searching for other videos for kids about planets, followed by videos about shapes, letters, and numbers. This little impromptu science lesson kept Babycake entertained for almost two hours. That is a great success in parenting I think.

We all had a great time learning, singing, and squashing play-dough. If you'd like to see some of the other videos or sites we visited go to my Kid Education board on Pinterest.